First dates are awkward at best and downright disasters at worst. Perhaps the difficulty of dating is why there are currently more single people than ever before. However, sometimes the difficulties of dating can be a good thing. But, what if one day this really special person suddenly drops a bomb on you. After all, no one is perfect.
And if you do decide to date someone with a history of drug or alcohol use, there are a number of signs you must watch out for in order to make sure your new partner is living up to his or her promises of sobriety.
Recovering substance abusers often possess excellent attributes that are forged by the intensity of their personal experiences. They are often very compassionate and non-judgmental in their relations with others, will not shy away from confronting difficult problems head on, and will usually be right there to help those they love through their own darkest hours.
Successful recovering addicts and alcoholics will have learned much about the importance of honesty and open communication during their rehabilitation process, and this can carry over into their relationships with those to whom they become close. But when addicts and alcoholics suddenly begin closing down and become reticent to share what they are thinking and feeling, or to talk about what is happening in their lives, this is most likely a sign that something is wrong.
All recovering addicts have certain triggers that could lead to relapse.
Before becoming involved with them, it is important to sit down and have a good long talk about what those triggers might be, based on their past experiences and on the insights they have gained during their counseling sessions and during their time in AA or NA. With good communication about this topic, the partner of someone in recovery can do a lot to keep the process on track - while protecting themselves at the same time.
Feb 11, Dating a recovering addict can be complicated, but most relationships are. So long as you know what to watch out for, work to ensure you're both getting your needs met . Feb 12, Dating a drug addict, as with dating anyone, comes with pros and cons. Con: Lack of trust Drug addicts, even if they have been clean for months or years, are difficult to multicoingames.com: Tatiana Baez. Jan 31, After dating an addict, I recognized five things I wish I did differently. If you're currently dating an addict, perhaps this will be helpful to you. I was finally in a solid place when I met my now-ex-boyfriend earlier this year.
While recovering addicts or alcoholics can make excellent companions, there is one principle that should be followed without exception - do not become involved with someone in recovery from substance abuse unless they have been clean and sober for at least one year.
This is the advice that addiction counselors always give to their patients, and it should go double for anyone thinking about becoming involved with a former drug or alcohol abuser. If someone in recovery is asking you out or making other kinds of advances at an earlier stage of their rehabilitation, it means they are ignoring the recommendations of their counselors, and this is not a positive harbinger of things to come.
We are talking about people with addictive histories and personalities here, and if they are trying to jump into a relationship too soon, there is a very good chance they are attempting to fill the void they feel inside by replacing their drug of choice with something else that will give them the high they are craving. If this is something you find yourself frequently seeking in relationships, you may want to consider talking to a professional or someone who can help you break this unhealthy dating pattern.
Of course, all relationships require support. However, supporting an addict really requires you to go the extra mile.
Most recovering addicts especially early on need to see a therapist, attend several group meetings a week, and do a tremendous amount of self-care.
This could interfere with date nights, social events, and other things. You may think you know a lot about addiction and recovery.
Oct 05, Being in a relationship with a recovering alcoholic or addict certainly comes with unique challenges. If you've decided to move forward with dating an addict, here are some dos and don'ts. Use these tips to make having a relationship with an addict in recovery a lot easier for you both. The Dos of Loving A Recovering AddictAuthor: Mccarton Ackerman.
But the truth is, unless you are an addiction counselor or work with addicts on a regular basis, you probably only know the basics. It can also be beneficial to join a support group for friend s, family members, and partners of addicts.
Also, be aware that even though triggers can fade over time, they are a lifelong problem. This means you will need to be mindful of them during the entire duration of your relationship. For example, someone being in recovery does not allow them to cut off communication for days or weeks at a time, bail on you, or be unfaithful to you.
Every relationship needs trust, but a little extra dose of trust is needed when dating a recovering addict. If you constantly question your partner about their whereabouts or keep tabs on them, then your relationship will be doomed.
Your partner will eventually come to resent you for your lack of trust. Unless you see major warning signs that your partner is slipping up, you need to maintain an open mind and withhold judgment.
Dating an ex addict
But remember, for a relationship to work, things need to be equal. Regardless of if your partner is struggling or doing great, you always need to make time to take care of yourself. Make sure you are eating right, sleeping well, exercising, and finding time to enjoy your favorite hobbies.
Why Opiate Addicts Act the Way They Do and Why You Shouldn't Take it Personally
However, while it can be difficult to date a recovering addict, keep in mind that all relationships have their challenges. If you have any questions or comments about these tips, please let us know in the comments below. And, be sure to check out this guide to learn what to do if your partner relapses.
Please leave this field empty. What should you do with this information? Can you handle dating an addict?
Whether you will be able to trust an addict in recovery is up to you. Some people will feel they can never trust a former addict, while others may be able to suspend their doubts. The decision is personal and entirely yours to make. Dating someone in recovery is different from dating someone who has never been an addict. Feb 11, If you believe addiction is a sign of weakness or a character flaw, dating a recovering addict probably isn't for you. Sometimes, if your alarm bells are ringing, there is a good reason. Posted by loveaddiction on 04 18 12 in Love Addiction News | Comments Off on Dating a Past Drug Addict or Alcoholic When they finally manage to get past all of the chemical baggage that they had been carrying with them for so long, what you will find in most instances is that former addicts have just as many outstanding qualities as anyone else.
But, if you are going to date an addict, there are some things you need to know first. So, what do you need to know? Check out this guide to learn the top tips for dating a recovering addict.