Home Recent Discussions Search. Hey everyone. Just wondering what others think of this - I have been taking a break from dating in the last few months since being told by a couple guys that they did not want to date me because I was too fat. Since then I've been focusing on myself and getting healthy, which is great I know. And I am doing this for myself first. But I am just wondering if I should give up on dating until I reach my goal weight, or if I should keep trying at my current weight in hopes that there is a guy out there who will like me for who I am no matter what the number on the scale.
Does that mean she should abandon her weight loss goal?
But her efforts to change her life and body are not mutually exclusive from efforts to meet people, nor do they have to be sequential. In other words, there is no official start date.
Dating is a process and it's ongoing, and there's no better time to start than now. No matter what size you are.
And have losing weight dating there can
The idea that you should "work on yourself" before you start dating is what I call living in the future perfect tense. Tense being the operative word here. This notion that you'll be perfect in the future is crazy - and confers a ton of pressure on you to be the perfect weight, to look a certain way, before you endeavor to connect with another person. It'll hurt even more because you'll think, "If no one wants me nowafter all this, how could anyone ever?
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My advice to Jen was to keep doing what she was doing: Staying active, eating well, and reaching out, setting up dates, meeting people wherever she goes. The best relationships in the world must grow and evolve - they don't start and remain perfect.
The idea that you should "work on yourself" before you start dating is what I call living in the future perfect tense. Tense being the operative word here. This notion that you'll be perfect in the future is crazy - and confers a ton of pressure on you to be the perfect weight, to look a certain way, before you endeavor to connect with another. Losing Weight Is Even More Important to Your Dating Life Than You Think By practicalh 04/19/ 02/16/ Attracting & Meeting Men, Attracting Women (Last ated On: 02/16/). Sep 18, While the former flames called it quits in December after just seven months of dating, the Washington D.C. native, 32, supports Rob's efforts to lose weight. "Go, Rob!Author: Melissa Copelton.
The same goes for you and your relationship with yourself. Embrace the process of growth and change with a forgiving spirit and you set the stage not just for personal satisfaction, but for the kind of intimate relationship that can evolve along with you.
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Guys can be jerks girls toodo what makes you happy. If dating is what you want to do, do it. Forget what others dates have said, and know you are still you even when the outside changes. I agree, do not let what guys say affect whether you date or not. The right guy won't care and the ones that do care about your weight aren't worth your time.
I do understand taking a break, though. I am single and not currently dating on purpose. It's important to love yourself first before you embark on a relationship. May 21, PM 1. First off, you're beautiful and you shouldn't let anyone tell you otherwise. Secondly, you most certainly should date! This will help you weed out the jerks from the good guys, and yes, there are good guys out there. I met my bf through online dating. I did have to meet a lot of weirdos, jerks and creeps, but the majority of them are just looking for someone to love.
You have to love yourself first, and then you will attract the right kind of guy.
My bf encourages me and we go for long walks, and hiking. Don't be in a rush, enjoy your new body, get a cute outfit.
The right one is out there, just don't give up.
Thanks for your comments. It makes me feel a little bit better. But the online dating world is very cutthroat I have found, and it seems like guys are only looking for fitness model looking types.
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Even if we have everything else in common, it always comes down to my weight and I felt powerless. It does hurt to be overlooked because of your weight. I am trying to use this as motivation to be healthier. Just hoping there are nice guys out there.
Those guys aren't necessarily jerks and you shouldn't necessarily stop dating. Just see what's out there and don't be discouraged if you aren't compatible with every guy.
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My new gf isn't attracted to my fat pics 50 lbs ago that are all over fb from a few years ago but I completely get it. If either of us were 50 lbs heavier than we are now, we would have never had a first date but now that we're more serious we'd see past it and of course push each other to be healthier.
I understand that everyone has their own preferences when it comes to who they want to date. My question was more if I should wait until reaching my goal weight before "getting back out there". I know these guys aren't necessarily jerks, however they were pretty harsh and could have said things differently in a way that was less hurtful.
Jul 06, When you wake up at pounds, unable to walk a city block without pain, there's a good chance you're carrying as heavy a weight in your soul as you are your 5 foot 4 frame. trying to lose lbs before i put myself in the dating world (i carry extra weight terribly, it's a struggle to get a date at my current weight but so much easier minus 30) the weather is so nice and i miss going on dates. the loneliness makes me want to eat. but if i eat, i will stay lonely forever and want to eat even more. what a cycle. May 21, My weight loss is not STOPPING me from dating, it's how I feel about ME right now that is stopping me until I am ready. May 21, PM. 1. spitfire Member Posts: Member Member Posts: Member. First off, you're beautiful and you shouldn't let anyone tell you otherwise. Secondly, you most certainly should date!
When you find the right person you will know it and they will too. Just be yourself and let it happen While I haven't found that "one" partner yet, my entire equilibrium has shifted. My focus is now on living the best life I can, regardless of if I am dating or alone. Until I come across someone to share the journey, I get the kick-ass job of continuing to honor myself with loving thoughts and actions.
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DO YOU WANT TO LOSE WEIGHT BEFORE YOU START DATING?
Sarah Sapora. What does all of this have to do with dating? Here is what I have learned: 1.