Learn how to navigate the world of dating in Germany as an expat with our helpful guide to the local dating culture, etiquette, faux pas, and more. Dating someone from a foreign country can be an exciting experience. Different cultures around the world have a different appreciation of the qualities that make someone a desirable mate. What one culture considers romantic, attractive, or polite, another might not. This is where learning about the local dating culture will really help you out. Luckily, this helpful guide to dating in Germany does just that by providing the following information:. Are you looking to meet single expats and potentially find 'the one'?
Online dating is gradually catching on and opening people up to a whole new world of dating in Germany. Infor example, one in five Germans were using a dating app or website to meet potential partners. Interestingly, their tendency towards caution and privacy bodes well for online dating. Users are able to carefully get to know someone online first, using filters and facts to guide them.
Another popular way to meet potential partners is by joining multicoingames.com groups in your local area and attending events for singles. There are numerous multicoingames.com groups throughout Germany that are designed for those who are interested in dating and new relationships. This can be a fun and safe way to meet new people and develop both friendships and relationships. Groups usually cater to specific age groups and sexual preferences too, which allows members to meet like-minded people.
When it comes to dating in Germany, there are no set rules regarding where to go on a date, how long to wait until you call, when to get intimate, and so on. Because Germans generally prefer taking their time to get to know someone, this really depends on the individuals involved.
As previously mentioned, many Germans prefer to date within their own social circles. In most cases, groups of friends who know each other well over a long period of time will party together. Eventually, people will simply pair off from the group and creates couples.
If a German woman accepts an invitation to meet alone with a man, however, she may not interpret this as a first date or a clear indication of romantic interest. Rather, she might think of it as an opportunity to simply get to know the person better. Just like anywhere else in the Western world, dates might involve going to the cinema, having cozy dinners, meeting up for coffee, or going to a bar.
One important thing to know, however, is that while some cultures date numerous people at the same time before going exclusive, Germans find this offensive. In this sense, you might consider dating in Germany as more meaningful than in some other cultures throughout the world.
For starters, Germans value punctuality as an important quality which means that they will never rock up late to a date without a good reason; and in turn expect the same of their partner.
Dates also tend to be planned in advance, which means that flippantly suggesting getting together sometime or springing spontaneous plans on them will not be well received. This means that any attempts to compliment them might go straight over their head - or they might not believe you are being sincere.
They might not even realize your attempts at flirting with them. And when it comes to conversation, Germans tend to value deeper discussions with a purpose far more than pointless chit chat. Therefore, small talk will not hold their attention.
While many expats find this level of frankness quite liberating when dating in Germany, those who are more easily offended soon learn they have to toughen up if they want to date a German man or woman. Finally, because gender equality is strong in Germany, customs such as splitting the bill is not a big deal.
As previously mentioned, the German approach to dating is to take things slow and really invest time in getting to know a person. The pace at which a relationship evolves is also down to the individuals. However, generally speaking, couples in Germany usually live together for months or even years before they decide to get married. Although this is no longer necessary, many Germans continue to do so out of respect.
When couples do eventually tie the knot, there are some pretty quirky wedding traditions and customs that follow. One of these involves the groomsmen kidnapping the bride after the ceremony and taking her to a bar; there, she must wait for the groom to find her. I am so glad with my german boyfriend, I feel protected and safe, because he means what he speaks so hard to find in Brazilian men!
I lived it! I just knew a German guy on the internet. We writoe to each other alot every day. And step by step i felt in love with him and i thought the he got the same way in me as he planed a trip for this Christmas to come to my country. He also planed for our future We were so happy and shared anything we did daily to each other. But maybe he wont do what he promised or planed. He ignored my calls and sms after his Berlin business trip last Saturday. We still chatted abit at night of that day, and he said he would write to me next day and he also ensured that our relationship is not dying.
However, i did not receive any news from him later I think we are over, even that we cant be normal friends anymore. I just dont know what really happened with him and with us. I have blamed myself that if i did something wrong to make him angry?
He just ignored all my calls and sms, but he does not blocked me or delete my contact. Can you guys tell me why? And what can i do now.? Thank you! I could have a lot of issues here. A guy that plans!!
Turns head, that is amazing. A guy that is honest!!! I like the upfront honesty you ascribe to German men rather than the juvenile gamesmanship of some other cultures. I think that any girl who ends up with a German guy is lucky, because they can often be very giving and aware of your needs. This is totally my kind of romance! On time? Does what he says? Plans things in advance?
Jun 22, An overview of dating in Germany. The dating culture in Germany is similar to other European countries. Interestingly, the number of German-foreign partnerships has more than doubled within the past two decades; according to the website The multicoingames.com fact, there were million German-foreign couples living together in , of which million were married. German men can be romantic but it's likely it's different than you're used to. In my 20s I would have considered dating a German guy boring. In my 30s I consider them sexy, so much so that I . Aug 30, Speaking as an actual German: We don't do dating the way Americans seem to understand it. We don't even have a German word for it. Either you are in a relationship or you're not. Some people do ONS, but that's not the norm. Relationships are usually formed out of pre-existing friendships. Those friendships are formed from common interests.
That kind of stuff is amazing. I assume there is some similarity. At least an interesting read. Though when I go out to the bars with friends and do our normal people watching, it is often hard to tell the couples. Germans seem to socialize in larger groups. I clearly need to relocate to Germany. The rules are very much ingrained here. During my two years in Germany, I only dated one german man - a guy who was funny, a planner and took me to probably one of the most unexpected first dates at that time, that is, while being a student.
He picked me up in his car without telling me where we were going and so we ended up in a neighboring town having a very regional dinner with wine in an old watermill, overlooking a beautiful bridge. I was seriously impressed as I thought it was overly romantic!
I hear it almost every day at work. I definitely had culture shock in the states with the super friendliness, fake friendliness at that. As a rule in Germany, once you break the ice, everything is fine. And if you have no clue what to talk about with someone to get rid of that awkward silence, you can never go wrong with the weather.
Germans LOVE talking weather, weird but true. Traveling in couples or with friends is popular in Germany. It looks like a lot of fun. Linda - I agree, actions speak louder than words and mean more.
Thanks for your kind words about our Telegraph story. Tiffany - I found the paying thing confusing at first and slightly annoying as well. I agree that German guys can be very giving. I wish J. Christy - Agreed, it would have been boring when I was 20, but in my 30s this is the kind of stuff that I like.
Katherina - That is incredibly romantic, especially for a first date! Most Germans I know are more pragmatic on a first date, preferring to meet for coffee or a drink. Jessica - I admit that I was one of those people who thought Germans were cold at first as well - until I understood the reason why Germans are like that.
Germans are also more comfortable with silence than North Americans are - something that I admire.
German specific or not I have to agree that the qualities you list are good to have. I loved reading this. Finding bloggers in Germany that are not German is a hobby of mine! German rules! Thanks for the blog! Congratulations on having found each other! Kristi - Glad to hear it. I fell for my now German husband very fast as well.
Hope it works out for you. Keep me posted. I think this is a good article. I have just started seeing somebody from East Germanyhe is warmer than most West Germans, we both remember a time when Communism was a factor, but he is typically German none the less. The most important thing to remember is that German men are unfailingly honest and they do have a strict moral code, well most of them.
Those from decent familiesthey have high expectations of themselves and others. German men are very goal oriented when it comes to work. This guy has financial goals and everything he does feeds into that. But he is making me a priority by earning enough money to come back soon, maybe spend the winter here and maybe pack up and move his business here, all of which we are starting to plan for now.
I like this practical forward momentum. And yes he pays for almost everything; another reason why work is important. Heather - Thanks so much for sharing your experience.
Let me know how it works out for you. I will be leaving in two weeks to see a German man in Munich. I am not sure if it was because I was brought up by German Grandparents or not but I find my guys approach to our relationship a breath of fresh air. I am not your typical American girl, but raised in America none the less so I enjoyed seeing your insight on German men.
Chelle - Best of luck. I hope it goes fabulous for you. Let me know how it goes - fingers crossed for you! Gosh, I loved this post! This just checked off all my dude requirements, for real. Abba - Thanks. Aww, this is so sweet! I have a sort of date with a German coming up - now I know what to expect! Love this article! I am Canadian but have been very impressed by how polite and down to earth Germans are. I agree with you, German men are very underrated!
Katharina - As a Canadian, that makes me soooo happy to hear that. Germany is definitely very clean. Hi, thats really funny to read that, because i talked with my italien flatmate about it and he said kind of the same. He misses the passion about love. My ex-boyfriends were very old fashion.
That dating a german guy reddit are
They opened me the door of the car, and looked on which side they are walking. So there are a lot of different types here i think. But yes, Germans are kind of boring and reserved.
"Rules" for dating are a little different but be aware that holding a person anywhere beyond a short brush is an intimate gesture but don't worry, if the guy is serious he won't mind. The rest isn't any different. Dating always is a trip into the unknown. EDIT: Oh, one thing: Be ready for a variation of the "German . Dating a german guy, one of the biggest challenges ever faced. I am a fresh fish swimming in german waters, my flight landed in Frankfurt 6 weeks ago. I'm getting to know with the german ways. And, I'm afraid, I might be falling for a guy, as well. A very wonderful attractive well-educated and funny german guy but, according to what I have. I started "dating" a German guy, and he's confusing me I've been talking online to a German guy for like 2 months because he was in another country. He said he was looking forward to our first date, and he was a bit flirty too over texts.
Liane - Oh you must let me know your opinion on Canadian men and what happens. I find them nice, but kind of boring. Especially about punctuality. Also agree that most German women are better than men for dealing with bureaucracy. My German female friends have been very helpfulmy husband? I am dating a German manhe is everything this article says he is.
He is always consistant, which is such a refreshing change. Hi i really loved reading this blog. We both connected very quickly. If you do something wrong, a sincere apology should be enough to make him happy again. Katharina - Excellent point! I find Germans are much more willing to take the bad with the good than we Canadians are! If things go well with him when he is here on his holidays.
I like how they flirt in a shy way? I like a german guy soo much, he is perfect; respects me soo much, sweet, nice, and gentleman.
Mariam - Yeah, it is shy. He opens the door, allows me to walk in first, encourages me to order first, speaks about whatever is on his mind like politics and world affairs or work and family, pays for the bill and then behaves totally normal when we go back to the hotel.
We spoke on the phone for a month before meeting, then we shared a hotel room separate beds for a week. On night number four he made love to me.
He instigated his move by asking me to lay next to him for ten minutes before he fell asleep. He flirts with me generously by sending picture texts at night and wishes me a good day every morning.
He always does what he says. My experiences are far from O. I do agree that some Germans might be reserved at first, but later would open up. That is what happened with my German friends. They are not sympathetic and not supportive at all.
On the other hand, I dated an Austrian guy who turned out to be a sweetheart!
I later dated a Swiss guy who was actually really nice and funny, we are now good friends. But Germans not my thing! Beth - I totally get it. The good news is if you tell them and show them what you would like, most of them do listen. Interesting about the Austrian and Swiss guys, I would have thought they would have been similar to German guys. Love your post! However, as a German girl, I have to say that this is a little to general.
Yes, German guys are mostly on time. Annett - Agreed, these are generalizations and unfortunately douchebags can be found everywhere. My german partner and I recently have a big dispute. She literally chooses to ignore my texts.
And then, try to approach your partner by opening up about the things that frighten you. Write it in a real letter - possibly with a pressed flower stuck to it. If your partner values you a lot, s he will come around and at least try to understand your pov. Hi I want to find out if you meet a German Guy online and he ask you to move in if he mean it. I met a German Guy I have been to talking to sometimewe both fell for one another. I am from the UK but living in the US. He texts me and tell me he misses me very much everyday.
Even the I love you have come in also recently, Germans guys are hunk lol! Any help would be appreciate.
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Definitely worth meeting him in person a few times first before moving in with him. Hi Laurel, Thank you for your response! We defiantly planning on meeting one another soon, but my job as a Lawyer is demanding, But he kept asking me when we are going to see one another.
They say that German guys are shy but in this case I did not see this. We talk everyday on the phone he always have something interesting to tell me. I find him to be kind, caring and a polite guy.
He lives alone so I am planning on going to see him and stay with him. It funny one of my friends gave him a call because she wants to move to Germany and she says he was so shy when she was speaking with him. When she told him thanks for making my friend happy he gave a laugh and did say anything else.
But I told her he was not like that with me at all, even our first phone conversation. I enjoy reading your blog keep up the good work.
Hi Laurel, Thank you for your well wishes! He said to me you make my heart go blind by loving you. My German comes off so loving. I tell him I do not what I will do with him. From what I read it is so different what they are saying about German Guys. Julia - Happy Birthday! Your guy sounds very sweet!
Hi Laurel, Thank you! I wanted to ask if German Guys, when they having problems if they would pull back? Meaning personal or work problems. Have a nice weekend. Let me know how it goes!
Dating a german guy reddit
Hi Laurel, I would say he worked hard in wooing me to get me, because we met online. But now he is more relax now, and compare to what I read German Guys are really not that way. I asked him as you had mentioned, he told me he was having personal problems, but he did not want to talk about this time with me.
So I let it go, and decided when he was ready he would let me know. H e let me know when he has plans to do things with friends and family. He tells me that I am wonderful and he misses me so much, almost daily. We have not been speaking much because of this, but two days ago he called me to tell me he wanted to hear my voice before he went to sleep.
The time difference is also a killer for us. When he is going to work I am going to sleep, so what I am doing is giving him his space. I also let him know that I am here for him if he needs me to talk about anything that is bothering him he can vent.
Commit error. dating a german guy reddit for that interfere
So I am drowning myself with work, But I must say dating a German is defiantly different than dating an American or Scottish. But all is it a cultural difference. Laurel I wanted to know if you live in Germany? But thank you for your advice and writing this blog educating us on German Guys.
Sorry, can dating a german guy reddit interesting phrase
Julia - It sounds like you guys have a great connection, but need to meet as soon as possible. Maybe you can meet somewhere halfway and spend a weekend together? I visited my now husband two months after we met on vacation as I wanted to see what his life was life in Germany and that was really helpful. Best of luck! They know how to make you feel badly. If you have to wait until their are accustomed to see you around, It can last one year or more, what means they are racist because like people from community, and not people because they are simple people.
German are moody, unfriendly, conformist, and without sexual hormones, to not say indifferent to all the subtleties of love and tenderness. All the world is romantic but Germans. Even a Japanese robot is more sentimental. I am not kidding, that is really fucking awesome. There is not way to describe them without insulting them, because they are insulting all type of kindness with their behaviour. They want only be the best at obey their race, they are very tribal, they have the last model of iapple but their soul are in the medieval age yet.
They want only have children for the state, live alone, and practice only single activities.
Dating in Germany - Dating German Guys - Dating in Berlin
They prefer a dog than a chat with a foreigner. If you come to Sachssen, You will see all the parks full of solitaries people with dogs, complete silents, no smile, no laughter, The perfect world to be a statue and do only your job. They say they know Peru, but they dont know have to buy a ticket bus in Lima or how to cook a Ceviche, etc. Leindenschaft only at work and shopping new gadgets.
We all know how their are and that will not change. We are very kind with thesedisrespectful and rude tribe. Sie sind hasslichen!! I have never see a couple of Germans kissing in the street!!!! I swear you. I hope you are able to find some nice German friends, as there are nice people everywhere. I enjoyed your article. I just met a German man. We both work internationally and are well traveled. I saw him out one night and he gave me a look and smiled so a few days later I asked him out.
We had a good time and he thanked me, said the pleasure was all his, when I replied thanks for coming. Long story short we had talked about going to a movie. But he never actually sought me out for a second date. I told him stop by my office. Also before I asked him if he wanted my phone number and he said yes but his friends came over and he said I will get it from you next week.
He is a genuinely nice person, but a usually a polite American response is a blow off. I knew enough about German men to pursue him a little but how far does being direct go?
Would he rather be polite than say no? Thanks for listening hope you can offer some insight! Dallas-Fort Worth. Mexico City.
Dating a German guy So I have been with this German guy for a few months now and we spoke everyday suddenly this past week he stopped talking to me. I'm trying g to be understanding and respect his space but he is not saying anything. The woman of your dreams is probably multicoingames.coms are she'll not wear a dirndl, but she sure can drink a truckload more beer than you. But, beware, dating culture here can be a bit different than you are perhaps used to - we even wrote a song about multicoingames.com are 10 commandments you should follow when you date a fraulein. German men are not a homogenous group. You'll find gentle and rough ones, controlling and egalitarian ones, etc. One thing can be said about German dating culture, tough: "Dating" is a rather new phenomenon that hasn't reached every part of the nation. Just semi-casually meeting people that one might or might not have romantic interest in, or even meeting multiple people at the same time in.
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